Those echoed in my mind, the reason of my tears to have the spotlight.
Why Raze giving me a false hope? Gush! This is really hurt. What if I'll talk to Trivor that he'll replace
me for a new worker? Aish! As if I can convince him.
Krrrnggggg~
You and I
We're like fireworks and symphonies exploding in the sky
With you, I'm alive
Like all the missing pieces of my heart, they finally collide
So stop time right here in the moonlight
'Cause I don't ever wanna close my eyes
Without you, I feel broke
Like I'm half of a whole
Without you, I've got no hand to hold
Without you, I feel torn
Like a sail in a storm
Without you, I'm just a sad song
I'm just a sad song
With you, I fall
It's like I'm leaving all my past and silhouettes up on the wall
With you, I'm a beautiful mess
It's like we're standing hand and hand with all our fears up on the edge
So stop time right here in the moonlight
'Cause I don't ever wanna close my eyes
Without you, I feel broke
Like I'm half of a whole
Without you, I've got no hand to hold
Without you, I feel torn
Like a sail in a storm
Without you, I'm just a sad song.
Since I leave him, sad song became my favourite song. It still touch my heart and as always, reminds
me of him.
Calvin was my caller.
"Hi Ron, 'zup?"
"Yow! Cathy where are you?"
"I'm at home, why?"
"Can we meet? I'm here at Cazila because I have a new project here. Don't you mind if we eat lunch
together?"
"Wow, sure! I'm excited. Where?"
"I know you are. You're going to choose where!" He even chuckle
"Really? Hmm, let's meet at Raquen Restaurant then. That's my favourite restaurant."
"Okay, I saw that one. See you,bye!" He hung up the call.
I just change and after a moment, I already saw him parking his car since the restaurant was near to
our subdivision and I came ahead of him.
"Mr. Suarez, hi!" He has a big smile that really fits him.
"Let's go, Mrs. Suarez!" He laugh and I too.i clamped around his forearm that made us into an escort
position.
We have some steak and grapes wine, paired as always. Aaahh, I miss home.
"When did you arrived here?" I ask while cutting the steak.
"Yesterday!"
"Hmm, where did you stay? You're very welcome at my house and you know that!"
"I know but I'm staying with my friend, remember Josh? We are partner to that project and maybe I'll
stay here longer!"
"I see, that means we're going to meet more often?"
"I guess we will!"
"Sir, this way please!" I heard the waiter. Shit! Why I look back? Our gaze met and he looks confused.
It's maybe because he heard earlier that I felt sick yet he saw me here. Did I care for his opinion? He
even with his girl again. Aish! What am I saying? Why all of the famous restaurant we'll met here? Tsk!
"Cathy? What's wrong?"
"A-ah? Ahm, nothing!" I smile forcedly.
Heck! The waiter give them a table across ours. That's sucks.
Luckily, Ron didn't notice Raze because if he does, he might tease me.
"I'm done!" I said and put down the table napkin.
Ron² ask the bill and pay it through card, wow! He is obviously richer now. All the time I just look away
so I can't see Raze. Kind of awkward or it's just me who feel that way. Hayss!
"Here's your card sir, thank you!" The waiter go back and after that we left talking about where his
project site was.
The next day, I decided to cook, I don't want to bump with Raze early in the morning again. I sigh, I'm
still not ready to face this new day. I still can't afford seeing Raze with someone else because it's still
pretty hurt.
"Good morning sweetheart, Andrie told me you're doing well and great as always since you finished
early. See you later." Trivor texted me. I shook my head, they just don't know that I'm avoiding
someone.
Arghh! I guess it's going to rain. There's a low pressure according to the weather forecasts and the
clouds are quite misty.
I wear a gray hoodie and gray jagger pants that paired with my Nike air shoes. Simple yet classy.
I comfortably drive because this time isn't a rush hour and there's no traffic. I'm little early today.
I arrived 30 minutes earlier and I don't know that I'll found Raze alone at our working space. I was
hesitant to greet him but... "G-good morning sir!" Whoooo~ With him alone was suffocating.
I regret now going here early, I thought I won't bump into him yet fate again loves to play. Heck!
"Please drop your formality!" It was his monotone voice. I missed him.
"I-I can't sir" I answer sadly. I don't.know if he'll notice that. I was stiffened as he stood, putting his both
hands inside his pocket and step towards me. I feel like melting and I can't look straight at his eyes. If
he continue, I may cry hard in front of him.
Raze, stop it. Stop making things hard for me
"I'm your boss, can't you please just follow me?" His voice sounds like begging, why?
"You're my boss and you supposed to be not stepping this close to me!" I replied, still looking sideways
or else even my voice will start to crack.
"I mi-" he was cutted.
"Raze!" The door suddenly open, it exposed the girl who's clinging with him yesterday. She's here
again, obviously.
"Hi!" Raze respond and spun around to give her a quick hug so I just step towards my cubicle, acting
like nothing happened. So, he allow her to call her by name? I thought it's me alone who can call him
that but excepts to his dad of course.
"Sir, excuse me!" I call him. Why they're so close to each other? We're at work, if they want cuddling
each other then they must get themselves a room. Tsk! I'm not jealous, I swear!
"Yes? Any concern?"
"Can I bring my work at home?" I honestly say. I can't focus here anymore.
"Why? There's something that bothering you?"
"No!"
"Then you can't!"
"K!" I'm pissed. Aish!
I became calm when my co-workers arrived. I plug my inpods again while working so I won't be
bothered by something unnecessary to heard. All I know is that Raze and his lady was happily talking
and almost hugging each other.
I was so silent the whole time and again there's a snack around 9am and I choose to stay again and do
my job but as the boys get back... they bring something again for me.
A cup of coffee and potato chips, still, it's my favourite snack pair.
"Thanks Drex!"
"That's from the boss!"
"This might be for his woman!"
"That's for you, there's a note!" He said and go back at his cubicle.
"Chump, smile!" It was on the note. Chump! It's only him who call me that. \( T.T )/
I secretly look at him. How can I smile if he is happy because of someone else now? Tsk! If I'll smile,
that would be so bitter.
I roll my eyes yet no matter how uncomfortable I am I still accept the snacks he gave. At least he still
remember me as his hardworking employee.
Trivor came around lunch time so I eat together with them, the two boys and the boss. After that we do
our job again and Trivor left, h I'd he has a meeting. Whew! He just going to escape.
I manage to finish my character around 3pm and it's another good reason to leave. I feel like enjoying
tonight... something like going wild and crazy with a strong drink.
I arrived home and decided to do biking around the subdivision, it's quite relaxing. It takes me 40
minutes before I get sweaty so I rest a bit, cooling down and took a warm bath.
Wearing my crop top and a high waist shorts plus my sneakers so I won't clattered on the floor later. I
know, seeing my reflection... I'm ready now for a bar hopping.
I've been dancing with the crowd , drinking and go to another bar.
For the firth bar, I'm tipsy that feeling sober who's requesting for more shots. I feel like my world turns
slowly and the crowd became more wilder.
My phone rangs! I don't know who's the caller but I answer it.
"Yo!" I started
"Where are you?"
"Ha?"
"Where are you?"
"I can't hear you!"
"WHERE.THE.HELL.ARE.YOU?" R-raze? Ah? I'm drunk and hallucinating things? I'm not high right?
I'm not using a drug!
"Cheers!" I just utter and have a shot.
"Whooo!" I dance again, ignoring the call. I can't even wipe my screen to end the call. Gush!
"Miss? Let's dance?"
"I chaaann danccee a...alonee. jiji!" What I'm saying? I'm not crazy or something, right?
I feel like vomiting now.
I run, my steps doesn't go straight though I thought I can. My eyes were half open yet luckily, I manage
to go to the comfort room to vomit without making the dirt spread around. I feel like I'm still the natural
me.
"Whooo~ let's dance." I yell, dancing while walking in zigzag.
"Miss, what's your name?"
"Haaii, I'm lowrhencee. I'm ghaayyy! Can I call you phapha?" He go away. Why? Hahaha.
"Mr. Bartender, give me another mix. The most strong and most tasty shot!"
"Miss, you're already drunk!"
"Just give me *hiccups* more!"
"O-okay!"
"Yes! *Hiccups* ghood boyyy!" I said, pointing him my pointed finger and give him a wink.
"Here, this is called 'the taste of heaven' " he said and put the shot glass infront of me.
"Hmm, looks satisfying and sounds grea..at!" I keeps on hiccups. Why? Aish!
I grab it and.
"Bottoms up for meeeee, yeey!" I cheers to the air and let the shot glass touch my soft lips.
"Hmm, this is a kind of *hiccups* mystery that the ingredients stay unknown. Wow! Amazing! Another
wann please! Pretty! Pretty please! Another shot for my broken heart. Whoo! Party party!"
"Who break your heart?" Someone sat beside me.
"Hahahaha, it's the most hand *hiccups* some man in the planet. Raze! Whooo~ I'm sorry! I'm happy
for you!"
"You're happy for him? Why you're crying? What for?"
"You! YOU LOOK LIKE HIM. He doesn't have a twin *hiccups* you're an impostor! Go away!" He laugh
and pat my head.
"I'm not a *hiccups* dog! Bastard!"
"But you look like one!"
"One more *hiccups* Mr. Bartender please, for this man who call me a dog to go away!"
"I didn't say it, you just give me the idea"
"Whhhyy you're laughing? Ha? Ha? *Hiccups*"
"I just didn't know that you learn to drink, Chump!" He responded and licked his lips. Chump? Calling
me Chump? He is not Raze! He is impostor.
"Are you tricking me? You call me Chump. *Hiccups* waaaaahhhhh! Go aaaaway!"
"What if I'm Raze? What are you going to do?"
"Raze? Hahahaha! You're an impostor, aren't you? If you're Raze then you're supposed to be not here.
(Sobs)"
"Why?"
"B-because he is with his woman! That beautiful clingy woman!"
"Why you're crying?" He asked again.
"I'm not crying! That's a sweat! My eyes were tired so they are sweaty" I wipe my tears , I look around
and everyman I see was Raze, when I can get over him?
"Let's go home!" He said and hold my hand when I feel like my feelings flashback at the moment where
I and Raze were still happy.
"I can go home aloneeeee *hiccups*"
"You can't, you can't even stand straight!"
"You don't chaaareee!" I spat yet I can't do something against him.
He pay my bill and help me walking. My arm was around his waist and he do the same.
"Who are you?" I ask, I can't see him clearly.
"I'm your Knight starting today!"
"Like an angel sent from above *hiccups*"
"I am!"
"Yho know whaat *hiccups* I'm in love with someone I can't have anymore!"
"Then why you're laughing?"
"Haha, because he is happy and I have to? I'm coward, I didn't fight for him!"
"You're crazy!"
"Angels don't say *hiccups* bad words! That's minus to you life!"
"I'm not scared, you're really crazy! How can you cry and laugh at the same time?"
"Because it's hurt! I love Raze so much! Waaaahhhhhhh~" I'm really crazy.
"He still loves you!"
"H-he don't, I saw him... with someone else. Ohh~ that's my car. My baby thunder! Yehhey!" I run and
hugged thunder.
"Baby! Did you miss me?"
"Your car has a name?"
"Thunder say hi to my angel, angel this is my boy! Haha! Thunder. Yey! Baby thunder!"
"You look like a kid!"
"Yhesss! I'm still young so you can call me baby! Yewhoooo~"
"Baby!"
"Whahaha! You're tricked! That's a jowkeee!"
"Where's your key? Baby?"
"I can driveee, weweweehhh!"
"The key? You sounds like an ambulance!"
"You're a *hiccups* bad angel!"
"The key?"
"H-here inside my bag!" He get it and help me sit at the shotgun seat, he even buckle my seatbelt and
his scent was the same like Raze.
"I'm sleewppyyy! Angel? Please watch over me! *Sobs* " I remember Raze that made me cry before
the darkness prevailed.
___
"Ouch!" My head hurts and the other parts of my body too.
"Aww!" I massage my head.
"Finally, you woke up!"
"Waaah!" I was startled. "R-raze? Why you're here?"
"What do you think?"
"Tsk!" Fudge! It's already 10am? It means I'm very late for work. Gush! My boss is here, wearing his
suit. He is here to scold me? Do he really need to do that? Fudge, my head hurts so bad.
"Stand up now!" Is he mad?
"I'm not going to work! I'm going to sleep! Please also tell Trivor that he must send new employee in
Texno because I'll quit!" I said and lay down again, hiding under my comforter.
"I won't do that, get up now and eat. You can work tomorrow! Stop avoiding me too" he was calm
"I'm not!"
"Then get up! I made a chicken soup and porridge."
"I don't want to eat!"
"Don't force me to pull you. You're not a kid anymore!" Why I feel like crying? I felt guilt too.
"I'll eat if you'll leave!"
"Okay then!" I'm just listening to his footsteps and the sound of the door. When I feel that he is already
went outside my tears began to flow and I'm here, crying loudly like a kid.
"Damn it! I told you to eat, not to cry!" I was surprised, he came back... hurriedly and even slam the
door. He was catching his breath and look at me seriously and worried also while I don't have in my
mind to say... not even a single word.
All I know is that I'm crying silently now. I missed him! I missed him and that made me cry.
"Don't cry! Don't blame yourself. Okay?" He whisper, how did he know? He is making me cry. How can
I act tough now? He break my wall.
"I miss you... so much!" He hugged me and I burst in tears. I feel more pain in my head yet my heart
seems pounded out of love. He hugged me tightly.
"Stop saying sorry because it's not your fault okay? I still love you! I still love you, love!" He whisper
again and I feel something that drops at my shoulder, a dropping warm fluid...from his eyes. He is
crying.
" I was mad at you! You never explain, you never say goodbye! You just left me our memories that kills
me every time and a letter that I ripped into two because I can't accept it... I read it too late, just four
months ago. I was really mad. No! I was really hurt that enough for me to hate the world. After you left
dad sent me to Spain, to do a business there with Sabrina yet behind my knowledge they're going to
set up a wedding for us and I was that run away groom, willing to fight for the only bride he wanted to
say yes! I gave up the investment company to pay Sab's parents for everything and the name that I
ruined. I can't understand myself, I was the victim right? Don't you know that after that I was so happy?
Don't you know that dad explained everything , say sorry and for the first time in my entire life I feel
how to be loved by a father. I have a happy family, I have a booming business. Thought I have
everything yet you're missing and you can only complete the missing piece in my puzzle so I go after
you."
"I easily found you, sadly, you're happy with someone else so I just disappointedly leave, in tears and
trying to accept that we're not meant to be not until I found out that the man I saw with you was your
childhood best friend, just lately. I never expected you to be here too. Don't you know how sad the days
without you? Don't you know how I fight, don't you know that I'm still suffering!" I don't know what to
say, I'm just crying like he do while hugging me. I never expected a guy like him to cry like this, I didn't.
I hurt him, his efforts was like not appreciated because of my decisions yet it doesn't matter anymore.
"I'm really sorry. I love you so much, Raze!" The thorns inside my heart suddenly vanished.
"I love you too, love. I missed you! I love you!" He wipe my tears before he wipe his. I never expected
that this will happen early today.
"Are you ready to start all over again?" He sincerely ask.
"Yes! At all cost now Raze!" He don't say a word yet he give me a tender kiss before my tears of joy
silently flow again. I won't give up again love, I won't and I'm very sorry.
After the moment we already recovered. We have a lot of questions from each other and we answer
everything. Now, he is laughing hard ah he remind me what happened last night at the bar.
"You're hugging your car and say 'baby did you miss me?' you even introduced me to your thunder as
your angel!" He is laughing hard like he didn't cry earlier. Thanks God for this second chance.
I just smile and give him a peck to shut him up. After that day we go to met his parents. I'm happy to
see them again.
"Ma'am Rousey!" It's been a year and she's still beautiful like she didn't grow old, like my mom.
Everything is settled, I can call her mom again and dad for Sir Rance. I tell Trivor about me and Raze
but he said he know about it already.
I missed the mansion especially the family there, mother Sharn, the chef's, Sebastian and the past
meanie... Erika and friends especially the pets.
Later on, we go back at Lahzon, yes! It's we because I'm with Raze and his parents. Riding on a
chopper. Raze formally apologize to my parents and ask my hands.
A parents won't hender their child's happiness and yes it's a new adventure and a new chapter of our
lives.
Mom left the business to my aunt, we're going to Cazila now... just to enjoy the moment.
"Lorence Catherine Celo, will you marry me?" He was on one bended knee again, for the second time
and infront of the crowd.
"I will, I will Raze" he hugged me and give me a gentle peck after that.
I already have two rings because the first memorable one was still on my finger and I didn't take it
away.
"I love you, love!" He whispered.
The wedding will happen in a week after this, he is kind of excited and me too. I'm very excited.
Choosing gown design, theme, motifs, invitation, music, what, when, where and whatever... they're all
settled.
"Love I'm just going to buy a new set of pencils today. You don't have to accompany me, okay?" I said,
he is reading something on his magazine.
"Sure, just call me if you need something, take care!"
"Sure, bye love!" I said and wave before I head out.
I just head at the nearest bookstore, I was about to get inside when someone cover my nose and pull
me. I don't know but I felt sleepy.
"Hmmm! Hmmm!" My mouth was covered and I can't talk.
"Owh! You're awake, beautiful!"
"S-sab?" She's the leader of all of this? Gush!
"Yes! It's me. Sabrina Rex Davis!" She laugh Ike evil and now I'm shivering. I'm scared. Raze? Help!
I'm tied here and she might going to kill me.
She has a deadly stare. I'm doomed. Help!
"“Owhl! You're awake, beautiful!"
"S-sab?" She's the leader of all of this? Gush!
"Yes! It's me. Sabrina Rex Davis!" She laugh Ike evil and now I'm shivering. I'm scared. Raze? Help!
I'm tied here and she might going to kill me.
She has a deadly stare. I'm doomed. Help!
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