These are the word from the bottom of his broken heart.
He never did anything he would regret in the past 30 years. He never has any regrets and he would
never feel sad about any decision he made. Now, he has his first regret. Letting her come back is his
biggest mistake.
He thought letting go or not doesn’t matter at all in a relationship, and that he would have a bigger
chance because he had been there for her. He uses five years of effort to exchange for a chance to be
together with Lily. However, he’s defeated by his cockiness.
“Ryan…” Lily calls his name softly, “Don’t say that. I wronged you. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize. I told you, you don’t need to do anything about my feelings.” Most of the time, he
labels himself as a gentleman and he wouldn’t do anything to force her to accept his love. However, he
did many things for her without her consent and she is kind of forced to accept his good deeds. Why
should she apologize for what he did?
“Stop saying that. I treasure all that you have done for Adair and I. I’m grateful for everything you’ve
done.” The feeling Lily had for Ryan is, in a way, different. It is so special, sometimes she won’t even
know how to explain it.
“Five years ago, you rescued me from the reservoir in J City. Then we met in another state. It was all
destined. However, I helped you escape and stayed with you for five years, it is totally a selfish move. I
knew that you will eventually be gone one day.” After everything that he had been through, he learned
to take thing easily. He knew this is coming but what he didn’t expect was it would hurt so much.
“Please know that knowing you is the luckiest thing that happened to me.” Lily doesn’t want him to feel
bad about himself. She never wanted that for him.
“Sometimes I wonder, how tight did fate entangled you and Rex that you both could meet in overseas
after so long.” All that he wanted couldn’t fight against the fated destiny.
If it is a life that refers to everything Rex and Lily had been through, then losing Lily cost Ryan his life
too.
He never believed in fate. If he does, he had already got himself killed in the black market. However, he
does now.
“Lily, I guess we will have to go back to where we started now,” Ryan says bitterly. He knows once
everything is out today, their relationship will be frozen and it is impossible to move forward anymore.
Lily panics. She is afraid that Ryan doesn’t understand what he meant for her. “Ryan, please, don’t say
that anymore. How can we go back when we have been through so much together? You are as
important as my family, and this will never change.”
Of course Ryan knows that he is important to her but he doesn’t want to be just a random family
member.
Ryan put his hand on his forehead and covers half of his face. He closes his eyes where Lily couldn’t
see and tries to suppress the feeling of tearing. He remains the calmness in his voice and says, “If this
is your choice, I wish you all the best.”
The moment this comes out from Ryan, it reminds Lily of Vivian and what she did last night. She finally
understands the difference between self-love and the love for another person. If you really love
someone, you’ll respect their choice instead of holding onto it so tight that it hurt everyone.
Lily replies in a choked voice, “Ryan, you deserve better.”
She could never leave Rex in this lifetime. Not only because of what happened for the past five years,
but it is also because she is the mother of his child. She doesn’t deserve Ryan.
Ryan smiles, and says in the lightest tone, “I had already missed my chance.”
…
An hour later, Lily walks out of the apartment. She doesn’t even remember what she said. All she ever
remembers is the sad face of Ryan on the couch.
Whenever she thinks about what Ryan did for her and his endless support, she feels the pain in her
heart.
He is a good person. Although he might seem cold from the outside, if you manage to get into his
heart, he would have contributed whatever he has to you.
Ryan never talks about his past but Lily knows that it’s because it is too painful to talk about. He has
never felt happy before his success.
Lily hopes that there’ll be a lively, gentle and sensitive girl coming into Ryan’s life. This girl doesn’t have
a complicated past. All she needs to do is just keep delivering simple happiness to Ryan.
Adair raises his head and looks at his mother, who hasn’t been talking since they walked out of Ryan’s
place. He pulls her hand to get her attention, “Mommy, did you and Uncle Ryan got into a fight?”
“No, dear. Mommy is feeling a little bit tired.”
Adair believes Lily. He quickly speeds up, “Then we must go home faster. This way, mommy can rest
faster.”
They walk to their car. After getting into the car, Lily doesn’t drive away immediately. She turns and
stares at the tall building where Ryan lives in and tells Adair, “Adair must come to visit Uncle Ryan
frequently, alright? He misses you a lot.”
After all, he has been taking care of Adair for five years. Although he doesn’t say it out loud, she knows
how he feels about Adair.
Adair gladly promises his mother, “Mommy, can I come alone if you are not free?”
“Of course. If Uncle Ryan is free, you can come here anytime you want.”
“Great! We haven’t completed the Lego we build today. Uncle Ryan says we’ll continue another day. I
want to finish it before school open…”
Adair’s delicate voice soothes Lily a little from her heartache just now. In fact, nothing will ever change.
How she treats him, or how Adair treats him will never change. As long as he is good, they will never
forget about him.
…
When they are back to the Imperial Villa, Rex is in a conference meeting in the study room on the third
floor. Lily hands Adair over to Fanny. She then contacts her team in London about her transfer. Her
assistant, Fiona, makes an international call once she knows about it.
Lily walks to the balcony and picks up the call. She English gets a little rusty after all these time that
she’s back home, “Hi Fiona, it’s been a long time. Thanks for helping me out when I was away.”
“Lydia, what was that in the group? Are you planning to resign?” Fiona sounds surprised over the
phone.
No one has ever called her by that name after coming back to J City. She feels a little strange hearing
the name. “I will transfer some of my work to the others. The firm will still run normally but I will take on
a lighter role.”
“Why?!” Fiona is caught by surprise and she doesn’t understand her decision, “You founded this firm.
You shouldn’t have to leave. It belongs to no one else but you!”
Fiona has been with Lily from the beginning so she trusts her a lot. It is understandable that she
doesn’t want her to leave the company.
Lily frowns. Looking at the greenery in the courtyard, she feels calm, “I know. I didn’t want to quit but I
need to come back to my homeland. My child, my family, they need me.”
This moment, she isn’t an iron lady and she isn’t Lydia either. She’s Lily, the mother of a child and a
well-loved woman of a man.
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