They had a passionate night. Eunice doesn’t expect what she would see the first thing in the morning
would be the view of the man she spent a night with wearing his clothes, and he is trying to leave in
rush.
Eunice stares at the stiffened back of the man. He turns around and speaks to Eunice.
“I was drugged in the wine last night.” A simple sentence describes what happened last night. He isn’t
even trying to explain. He is merely describing the fact.
Eunice smiles silently and tries to hold her tears. She looks like a broken doll. She asks carefully, “So?”
Ryan stares at Eunice with a straight face. He could see the countless hickeys on her fair shoulders
and her finely sculptured collarbone under the blanket.
These marks seem to be shouting, “Look, you can do it with anyone. Even if she isn’t Lily!”
“Your love? Your self-control? It is all a joke!”
Ryan doesn’t look down on or hate Eunice at all. He is disgusted by himself. He thought he loves Lily
but what happened last night crushes all his assumptions.
Ryan has been holding up for so many years, and now, his assumption is overturned. He doesn’t like
how it feels like.
This is why when he sees the aggrieved look on Eunice’s face, he says, “I will compensate you.”
‘Compensate me?’
When Eunice hears what Ryan says, she feels like it is a slap on her face. She would rather hear him
saying that it was a mistake, or that he was forced. But when he used the word ‘compensate’, Eunice
felt insulted.
What does he think she is? A prostitute? And he wants to make it up to her after sleeping with her?
Eunice feels ashamed. Her fists are clench to a point where her nails are in her flesh. She is furious.
Eunice steps on the soft carpet and stands up from the bed. The blanket falls on the floor. She walks
towards him naked. Her skin looks so smooth and fair, just like that of a newly-born baby.
Hickeys are all over her body. There are even some bruises. Ryan gasps and turns his face away, “Put
your clothes on,” he says coldly.
Eunice reaches out her hands and holds Ryan’s face. Ryan is surprised by her action. Eunice looks
into Ryan’s eyes and says, “Ryan, I do not regret what happened last night. I might not be who you are
thinking about, but that was my first experience. I’m not an easy woman. I wanted to do that
because…”
Eunice pauses for a few second, and then continues after she screws up her courage, “I like you!”
Eunice’s voice is soft, and might even be light, but the words she says makes Ryan’s heart race.
This isn’t the first time a woman confesses her love for Ryan. Many women talk sweetly to him. Some
say they like him, and some even say they love him, but he never feels touched. However, when this
vulnerable but strong woman bravely tells him that she likes him, he feels his heart pumping.
The temperature of his blood is rising and spreading to his limbs. He feels warm.
Ryan tries to dodge from her hands. He almost can’t breathe.
But this inadvertent action from Ryan cuts off Eunice’s imaginations. Look, he dodges all her touch
once he is awake. He hates her.
Eunice’s nose gets sour. She quickly turns around before her tears drop. All her courage is used up in
her confession just now. All she wants to do now is to hide away.
“You should leave. I need some time alone,” Eunice tries her best to remain calm, but her voice is
shaky.
Ryan stares at Eunice. His fists clench. He wants to say something, but he doesn’t know what to say. In
the end, he exits the room without saying anything.
Eunice could feel him leaving the room. She closes her eyes, and her tears drop.
Ryan leaves.
It’s like all her energy is withdrawn from her body. Eunice squats down and leans beside the bed. Her
tears keep rolling down. She knows their room is just beside hers, so she controls her volume. She
bites her lips so hard that she almost bleed.
Eunice feels like a joke. When she thinks of his cold expression and his silence after her confession,
she feels flooded by her weaknesses, inferiority and all sort of negative thoughts.
What a joke you are, Eunice! Even if he shows his kindness, it is because of the kid. He never likes her
in that way from the start. Even worst, he has never seen her as a woman!
He is such a noble and honourable person. Why did she let herself fall for him in the first place?
Eunice losses her courage to stand in front of Ryan, now and in the future.
How would he think of her? She must look like a joke to him.
She can’t pretend that nothing has happened after she gets rejected.
Eunice wishes that she can be like the other girls. Grabbing his arm, stopping him from leaving, or
asking him why he remained silent. But she doesn’t dare to do all that. The first confession of her life
just happened, and she is too ashamed to say one more word.
This is it.
Life continues. Lorraine’s medical fee, and Thomas’ school fee, everything isn’t settled yet. She doesn’t
have time to complain.
Eunice stands up and tries her best not to think about what happened last night. She takes a shower in
the bathroom. The whole time in the shower, Eunice avoids looking at the hickeys and bruises on her.
After putting on the clothes she brings, she quickly rushes out of the door without blow-drying her hair.
Quietly walking pass the room next door, Eunice quickly walks towards the lift. When she arrives at the
lobby, she checks out from the room and hands her room key to the reception counter.
After the procedure, Eunice gets into a cab and heads to the train station. She buys a train ticket in the
cab then turns her mobile phone into flight mode.
Eunice looks out of the window. The direction the cab heads is in the same direction where they went
for a walk last night. It is so different in daylight. Many people are strolling on the street now.
Suddenly, Eunice recalls something. She opens her photo gallery on her phone. The latest photo is the
one where Ryan leant on the railing.
The same view and the same photo, but when Eunice sees them again, she feels different. Her tears
roll down from her cheek and drops on her phone.
Goodbye, Q City. Goodbye, my messy relationship.
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